Poetry: “First Act of a Movie Where I Loved You the Entire Time” by Angela Sun

for dad

ESTABLISHING SHOT. Flowers purpling in the dying light
like fingers. Our house flushed with the smell of something sweet.
IN THE HALLWAY. You, walking into the shape of this silence—
white as bones in the lightning of cracks on the soles of your shoes
Where are you?
This place smuggles echoes into the night, the hoarse air
weaving into gravity.
Moon grazing the glass of your nails. You’re lifting me up and saying
come on we’ll be late.
You, the lighthouse; goalkeeper—
The crowd frenzies when you catch them leaving. Lately the orchids
are wilting
but you’re still watering.
IN THE KITCHEN. My mother thins her mouth into a fishing line.
Sunlight sieves in slanted on the porcelain in her hands,
the bowl’s rim dappling gold.
At least he cooks like nobody.
I hate you! I hate— Go back:
IN THE HILLS. You’re crouching among the wild yellow flowers
tall as your back.
Where are you?
The grass billowing like waves. A field of chives.
IN THE KITCHEN. The gas clicking like a metronome. We’re boiling dumplings;
the flour skin creased like stitches.
I hate you! I hate you! I hate how you ruin everything!
Let’s skip the part with the money and America,
the horizon so fresh that the sea looks pink. Let’s skip the part with
the sea.
TRACKING SHOT. Jogging up the spine of the staircase. To the
groan of the hallway floorboards.
You scared me. You have very light feet.
Well I’m good at it. Wearing an ellipsis
down into a full stop.
But back to the races, back to the beach before the tide
starts retreating, the camera burning the foreground to a confession.
We’re still running. You see how I’ll follow you?

Angela Sun is a writer from Edinburgh, Scotland, and a student in Evolutionary Biology. Her hobbies include guitar playing and arguing about the practical applications of her degree. She is currently catching up on Martin Scorsese movies. You can find her on Twitter @blessphemey.

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